Karen Karenson Reviews Everything

  7/10 Complaints: Good Food, Terrible Coffee, Coconut, More Coconut, Surprise Coconut, Where Is All This Coconut Coming From, Wobbly Tables, Odd Timing, Play Area, Comfy Seating, Indoor/Outdoor  Mr Karenson and I treated ourselves to brunch at Hey Coastie, a fairly new little establishment with a beachy theme in keeping with its coastal location. This place is very cute with a warm interior setting. It also has a comfortable outdoor setting boasting cushioned seating and outdoor heaters for those cold nights when all your smoker friends insist on sitting outside even though it's below zero and you can see your breath, as well as a play area for parents to send their kids to blow off a birthday party's worth of sugar while they enjoy a well deserved espresso martini. We chose this place because it was far less busy than its counterpart Long Beach next door, which is always packed to the rafters with 40 minute wait times. One of the drawbacks of the outdoor setting is that the ...

  6/10 Complaints: Great Food, Great Drinks, Good Atmosphere, Pretty Lights, Aesthetic, Crap Karaoke, Suicide Threats, Concerns for Staff Mental Health, Rudeness, Blood, Panda, Run-In with Manager  Mr Karenson and I recently had the pleasure and privilege of taking a plane trip down South to spend some much needed time away with mates and see Queens of the Stone Age, who were straight up AMAZING and didn't disappoint.  We met up with Linda, Bob, Bill, Daryl, Arlene and Patrick for a weekend of sightseeing and getting obliterated on fireball champagne bombs. One of our first prerequisites for the trip was a beautiful dinner out at Midnight Shanghai, followed by drunken, wildly mixed skill karaoke. I'm a notoriously bad singer who in the past, has been told "never to open my mouth again" by a surely well meaning acquaintance, so was a little nervous about this last activity. Mr Karenson is basically Jack Black with a Kiwi accent so was really hyped for it. Midnight Shan...

  Rating: 4/10 Complaints : Fish Not Fresh, Slightly Overpriced Drinks, No Waffles, No Big Brekky, Healthy Options, Salads and Sunshine, Wasn't Bad Though, Great Looking Pizza, Beer Garden One sunny Saturday morning in the not so distant past, Mr Karenson bounded out of bed like an enthusiastic golden retriever in search and anticipation of a birthday brunch for our good mate Bill. I'm not a morning person by any stretch of the imagination so was a bit slower to drag my sorry carcass out of bed and head, sans makeup and without brushing my hair, to the Boundary establishment to meet Bill, Bob and Linda for a brunch in the sunshine. I think I've only eaten here once before and probably had pizza or something, which isn't a full representation of the food on offer here so would have been unfair to review based solely on pizza. Every pub seems to do pizza, probably as it pairs well with beers, takes the edge off the inevitable drunk munchies and surely saves a lot of bar s...

  Rating: 0/10 Complaints - Delicious, Great Food, Pies, Cookies, Donuts, Coffee, Bagels, Healthy and Greasy Options, Nice Staff and Good Vibes, Edible Flowers, Choice Joe and Joy is one of those cute little pastel themed cafes tucked safely away from the main drag, and located very conveniently next door to a supermarket, kids playground and a library. I get such old school and comfortable vibes from this place, the food is truly excellent and it's the kind of place you can just turn up in your jeans for a Sunday brunch and have a nice breakfast outside in the sun, I find a lot of places now are on the pretentious or overly upmarket side but this place just seems to be about good food and friendly service. I'm not going to say the service here is overly quick as they are often very busy, but all the times I've visited, the staff have been so nice that the wait doesn't become bothersome in the slightest. This is definitely the place to go, I guess, for a cup of joe and ...

  Rating: 3/10 Complaints - Misleading, Lack of Info, No Chips, Expensive, Arm and Leg, Had to Remortgage House, Diner Food, Stodge Hungover and entertaining family but too lazy  fatigued to cook anything, we made the dubious decision to order 3 burgers from Salty's Diner via the even more dubious Delivereasy service. My beef (ha) with Delivereasy is that they jack up the prices at least 25% above dine-in rates and then chuck on a delivery fee, so you often end up receiving cold, travel-sick, severely overpriced food that leaves you wondering why on earth you didn't just heat up some spaghetti and dino nuggets and call it a night. I realise there is always a tax for convenience but the recent experience with Salty's was enough to have me repenting of my slothful ways and begging for the forgiveness of my bank account. I personally am not a huge fan of Salty's as there are simply too many carbs on the menu. While it's true that you can order some very good cocktails ...

  Rating: 9/10 Complaints: Cold, Late, Average, Meh, Middling, Expectation was Low and Still Disappointed, Undercooked, Pale, 45 Minute Wait, Pizza Hut, Downhill since the 90s, No Dessert Bar Anymore  I don't seriously think anyone orders food from Pizza Hut expecting it to be fine dining, but our recent foray into ordering from Pizza Hut really took the cake (or should that be pie?) We normally go to Hell's or Domino's, both of which are perfectly fine and do the job (it is takeaway pizza after all, and you sort of have to approach it with an open mind, hungry belly and a low expectation). Pizza Hut, similarly to so many well-loved institutions fondly recalled by anyone old enough to remember Y2K and handkerchief tops, has taken quite a dramatic nose dive in terms of food, service and atmosphere over the past 25 years or so. For those who missed out by being born too late, Pizza Hut used to be completely different to what you see now. Once upon a time, a visit to Pizza Hut...

  Rating: 2/10 Complaints - Slow Service, Parlously Understaffed, Amazing Food, Sweet & Sour, Sizzling, Prawn Crackers, No Booze for Karen, Huge Fan, Chinese Food, BYO On Valentines Day this year, Mr Karenson and I tried out this restaurant with our mates Bob and Linda. These guys are great value, accompany us on a lot of food adventures and have introduced us to a lot of great restaurants so we went with their suggestion of China Beach. The place used to be located along the waterfront but has moved approximately 200m and is now tucked behind the beach shops next to the hulk of Brunch & Burger, which used to be another great restaurant until they replaced the menu with subpar fare and Spandau Ballet and eventually closed. RIP. I've heard it said that if a Chinese restaurant serves truly good food, they will most likely give all of their focus to the food and not fluffy things like the décor or service standards. This held true for China Beach, which had the pretty standard...

  Rating: 7/10 Complaints - No Ambience, No Food, No Restaurant, No Booze, Cold, Unromantic, Closed Lifts, Dated, At Least There Was a Pillow, Premiocre, Save your Money and Go Elsewhere I was really excited to stay at the James Cook on the eve of my best friend Linda's wedding. Over the years I'd gone past this place and admired what I thought was old world charm and decorum. This place is admittedly something of an institution, having existed for many years and I'd heard good things from people who'd stayed there in the past. I guess I sort of imagined it would be like something out of a movie. The way the foyer is lit up, is admittedly very inviting and brings to mind images of crisp linen, sparkling champagne and a certain level of refinement. I found the experience staying at this place sorely disappointing.  First of all, we booked the luxury suite thinking hey, this is a once in a lifetime event, may as well splash out and book a good room and enjoy the evening. ...

  Rating for Prefab : 9/10 Complaints - Noise, More Noise, Noisy Noise, Couldn't Hear Myself Think Let Alone Order, Crowds, Condescending Rating for Mystic Cafe: 0/10 Complaints : Brioche, Dairy Free Smoothie, Polite, Quiet, Random Clothing Store, Cool My beloved mum Susan had to have surgery recently.  This was a pretty big deal as it was a total replacement of her jaw joint with a titanium part, the original joint was in a bad way from osteoarthritis and basically they had to cut out the damaged joint (yikes) and replace it. She's recovering well now and says she feels better now the arthritic part is gone, but it was pretty scary for her to have to go through such a major surgery. Shout out to Boulcott Hospital for giving her the best and kindest treatment I've ever witnessed at a hospital. How often do you get a nurse asking if you'd like extra ice cream and coming to make sure you received said ice cream?  Following the surgery, she had to return to Wellington a we...

  Rating: 0/10 Complaints - Seafood, Delicious, Considerate, Espresso Martini, Fish, Oysters, Sashimi, Cheese  Once again we ventured out, this time to Ortega Fish Shack for a friend's birthday party. Another first for me. The restaurant was excellent, which is just as well since I turned up at dinner very late, having had the most hectic day and not exactly in the best state (getting up at 3.30am will do that). To tell that story, I have to tell this story. So had a work event that I had to catch a 6am flight for, the same day as the birthday dinner. Because I live at least an hour from the airport, this necessitated both me and the long suffering Mr Karenson getting up at 3.30am in order to make it to the airport before 5.30am, and still somehow managing to be late. That's the odd thing I've noticed about time as it pertains to airports - it seems to slow down and turn to treacle but you are still either late or 7 hours early, and there will always be a line and a very s...

  Rating : 0/ 10 Complaints - Delicious, Steak, Sides, Fancy, Lenin, Wagyu, Espresso Martini, Wine Mr Karenson, weary of cooking me a rare steak every full moon, surprised me with a wonderful birthday dinner out to Pravda with our two best mates. This is a place I've always wanted to try but never had the occasion or the spare cash you will need for a fulfilling evening at this restaurant.  Pravda is the sort of fancy restaurant that you've probably seen represented in movies and cartoons. It sort of has a classic old school feel with elegant surroundings, dark wood and floral displays, all of which I vibe with on a deep level. I was so excited to try the steaks here as I'd heard great things about them, and was not disappointed. There is a massive banner on the wall of Comrade Lenin as well, I was a huge fan of his in high school and it brings back good memories of learning about the Russian Revolution while doodling on the back of a notepad and being disruptive (revoluti...

  Rating: 2/10 Complaints - Delicious Food, Group Dining, Cocktails, Extensive List, Chill Staff, Noise, More Noise, Busy, Espresso Martini, Booze and More Booze When we were invited to a mate's work event at Monsoon Poon, I had only eaten there once before when I was 18, trying to impress some silly boy and ordered lemon chicken in a panic without thinking about the fact that I hated, and still hate, lemon chicken. So it doesn't count. Wasn't sure what to expect, was nervous as all hell about meeting a bunch of new people and had just been berated by some old guy for parking one of those e-scooters near his apartment so was definitely in the mood to sit down and have a cocktail. I'm so glad I decided to change out of my heels and into my Docs before arriving at the restaurant, in anticipation of a slightly legless end to the evening. Monsoon Poon was incredibly packed with diners, being a Friday night after all. It's quite a large restaurant with what seems to be ...

  Rating: 1/10 Complaints - No BYO, Amazing Food, Delicious, Friendly, Fresh, Healthy When this place first opened, the only kebabs I'd really eaten were obtained from Abrakebabra in the city, the flavour obscured by a haze of alcohol and queasiness and the fillings unrecalled due to aforementioned alcohol. These always made a good finish to a night on the sauce, but I can't say I've ever eaten one sober so it's impossible to say if they were any good, or whether my abused stomach lining was just so grateful for food that a salad from the New World would have done the job just as well. While the kebabs at Lokanta would definitely make as good a Friday night booze sponge as any, I think they are best enjoyed sober as they are transcendently delicious, very fresh and deserve to be appreciated beyond your standard kebab. To begin, this place is conveniently located on the main drag and is easily accessible by car, bike or foot. When I worked a physical job up the road fro...

  Rating: 5 / 10 Complaints - Carpark, Old Food, Meat Selection, Karens, Altercation, Obscene Profit So this review is half about the actual Countdown supermarket, and half about a severely unpleasant incident in the car park that didn't need to escalate the way it did. If you were involved in this incident, please feel free to apologise in the comments. Countdown is my go-to for small and quick grocery shops, as it's a bit easier to simply pop in and out. The nearby Pak n Save generally has better prices and a wider selection, but is a much bigger supermarket and you need to have about half an hour on your hands, as opposed to doing a quick Countdown run and taking 10 minutes or so. It stocks all the staples you'd expect although the meat section deserves a special mention for being both limited and frustrating. There is very little choice in meat and they seem to package it up in counterintuitive portions, e.g you can buy 1 chicken breast or 3 but not a pack of 2. Someti...